it's a regular hot day in the desert of southern california.   boring boring boring.......

人就是這樣, 自己喜歡對號入座更喜歡幫別人扣帽子, 而且不光是女人會這樣, 其實這已經是全民運動了, 加上中國人(應該是全人類吧?) 的搞小團體的偏好和八卦的盛行, 都助長了這種怪異、噁心的行為.......

好像住澎湖就要很會游泳、捉魚, 住烏來就要會釣魚、捉螃蟹、和原住民喝小米酒, 那住飛機場旁邊就要會飛囉?   何嘉仁美語得何嘉仁親自來教?   長頸鹿美語就得是長頸鹿來教嗎?   住在大都市的人都是有錢人嗎?  住天母的小孩都念日僑、美國學校嗎?   那紐約皇后區的黑人個個都是毒販、幫派份子、男賣毒、女站壁、小孩兒翹課運毒品?

那兒來這麽多 Stereotypical judgement.......

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Let's talk about respect.

Definition,

• (usually preceded by `in') a detail or point; "it differs in that respect"


• esteem: the condition of being honored (esteemed or respected or well regarded); "it is held in esteem"; "a man who has earned high regard"


• an attitude of admiration or esteem; "she lost all respect for him"


• deference: a courteous expression (by word or deed) of esteem or regard; "his deference to her wishes was very flattering"; "be sure to give my respects to the dean"


• obedience: behavior intended to please your parents; "their children were never very strong on obedience"; "he went to law school out of respect for his father's wishes"


• regard: a feeling of friendship and esteem; "she mistook his manly regard for love"; "he inspires respect"


• regard highly; think much of; "I respect his judgement"; "We prize his creativity"


• show respect towards; "honor your parents!"


• deference: courteous regard for people's feelings; "in deference to your wishes"; "out of respect for his privacy"

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as alwyas, thoughts and ideas flows through so Fing fast and I can hardly catch any...

maybe it's because I was driving and got too caught up by those stupid driving genius on the road, yes....you can call this road rage^^

maybe because the music was too damn good and it makes me wanna shake my head......
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I post this to show that I am not giving up this place also I have plenty pics to upload and a photo album for Sloppy.

as day goes by, I constantly wonder if I can get out and do whatever I want to do just for half a day during week days..... never done it^^

but always thinking of getting more pictures done and get more pictures done
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Dear Mom and Dad,

I can't sleep so I came downstairs and write to you.   I kno wit's painful but I believe you would like to know about what I decide to do to Sloppy.

It's been few days that Sloppy had the runs and I thought it was minor problem that sometimes he had different food.   So we cut down the dog food portion and gave him some baked toast instead.   He's fine and active as usual.   But we found he's not even limping but dragging his read legs to do his "business" out side and I know something seriously happened.   Since it's not a easy task to move him to the vet clinic so we called in a mobile bet in our area for a regular check-up on Monday.   Thanks to Belinda that she was the one who can shared my work load and called the vet for me as I still needed to go to work.   The condition of Sloppy was good at his age but the spine problem.   It's too complicated for him to go through all the check-ups and exam at his age and the best solution is to give him steroid to easy his pain and get him mobilized again.   In the mean time that vet gave him the steroid shot and he also told me to consider to put him to sleep to stop his suffer and pain.   I felt numb and didn't know what to do at the moment.   I asked the vet to do the blood test to see if there's any disease or cancer so I can have some time to think it over.   I did and I talked to other dog lover and vet to firm my final dicision.   I would put him to sleep to save his dignity and stop his suffering from pain and shame.

It was rough for me since Monday morning and it was so hard for me to say "I would let him go".   I had Belinda to make to call to vet and have him come back here to perform the "action" today.   Yes, I would need to let him go.   I went to work for few hours in themorning then come back home around 2 p.m. awaiting vet to come and do it.   It was the longest wait in my life, even it's longer than those days I spent on the ship......

After I signed the agreement with vet and also wrote the check for all the application and service.   I was holding Sloppy's palm and rubbing his head to shift his attention from the injection.   It was quick.   It only took about 5 second to finish the shot and he went quietly and peacefully.   At the whole time, I took off my sunglasses and looked at him straight in the eyes and conformt him from the tention that was formed between me and the vet.   He looked quiet and calm after the shot and I was the one crying like a crazy person.   We then wrapped him into a clean tarp and put him into vet's van.   Sloppy will be cremated and return to me in a week.   Sorry Mom that I didn't listen to you because it's painful to let him go alone.   I will keep his ash in my place and bring it back to Taiwan if possible.   And I will not let him sitting in my garage alone, I will find a good place to put him and tell all my friends about how good he had been........and always been.

As life goes on, I will return to work tomorrow morning and be back on my life again.   Please do not worry about me and you two should be happy for Sloppy that he's @ a better place without any pain and suffer.   Sloppy will always lives in my heart forever.   My wild guess is that he's now staying with uncle in heaven and watching TV together^^

I'd save all the details and I will tell you two again when we meet.   I'm really looking forward to see you two again in July.  

Dad, the reason I didn't call you because I don't wanna interupt your heavy workload and hopefully you can tell from what I ahve said previously.   Sorry.

Mom, please don't be too sad about this and I'm totally fine after few good tears.

I also called Stephen Wen about Sloppy since he's been a very good friend to Sloppy ever since.   And I'm so happy to hear Stephen is getting married this September!!!   I'll be back for his wedding for sure!!!

Sorry about my limited English and I've gotta get some sleep for work!


Love,
Dean

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another night alone when my other half is doing work home from the other side of the state. while waiting for that special woman that I know I don't have any thought but feeling like to write something.

this is not a letter or some kinda cheezy diary but think of that in my way so why not write some down for the future when we look back together^^

we all know that it's hard to find soeone in your own life that will barely fit/match you in any way but luckily I happened to meet this woman a year ago. I guess in a way that I am the luicky one in my whole life. but to keep this going well and smooth is something I have never done it before. I am really putting up myself to a person whom would be my partnet or even my future wife down the road, so I am not worried that I would lose this great opportunity and I am trying hard to hold on to it with all my strength. sorry if I release too much of information but in my mind this is some major issue has been going around for days. how can I please her and how can I make her happy when she's down and feeling blue? how can I do if I can't give her all her wants...no no no....this is not that shallow but truth is that I wanna do anything for her so she's can be home free, trouble free and no more worries~

maybe this is already too much to be said but I really need to let it out somehow^^ I truely love her and I have never been this sure that I can do something in mylife that I will never regeret and feel this good before. and also I want her to read this knowing I truely love and miss her in anyway. let's wait and see when she finds out this post and get back to me~

wish all the people I know will have a great night sleep and wonderful day when you see this^^ keep up your smile and good luck~


D

me?

kicking it, relaxing, here and there, outer space? whatever~

me?

graphic design, photography, lomography, LOMOtw Rules~ that's something!!!

me?

happy, gaining, bloating, widening, expanding, says who?

me?

a random asian guy wandering in the city of Angeles......

me? hehehe
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